“She’s a whore!” he said.
And if the eyebrows (that I’d carefully drawn of my face that morning) traveled any further up my face they would have flown off into the atmosphere.
“Why would you say something like that? First of all, you know I hate that word. Secondly, do you live in her vagina?”
“Because it’s true!” he replied with a conviction that made me want to punch his throat out of the back of his neck.
And that how this blog began …
I was sitting on my porch talking to my friend about a mutual acquaintance.
But as I calmed down and we started to unpack his statement and how it made me feel, I found that while I didn’t care for his choice of language, I couldn’t take his opinion away from him …
and really shouldn’t want to …
because even though it’s not necessarily applicable in this situation (as I’m a proponent of minding my business when it comes to what other people want to do with their bodies) …
listening to other people’s perspectives …
can help you grow.
Think about the world we live in for a second.
Someone says something we don’t like on social media … we block them.
Someone has an opposing political view … we deem them a bad person and stop talking to them.
Someone lives their life in a way we wouldn’t … we determine they are an unfit friend.
And at the end … after all of the picking and filtering … we end up constructing our worlds; our circles around people and things that make us comfortable.
Given how complicated this world and navigating it can be, I don’t blame us.
But often times, being comfortable is not good for growth … and we’re making a mistake.
Take a look at any public figure that’s engaging in questionable behavior. From Chris Brown to our current president and you’ll find a group of people sitting around them agreeing with everything they say and do.
“Yeah, go ahead and tweet that offensive sh*t!”
“Oh, yes, it’s definitely OK to invite random women to your house .”
Yeah … that’s going to be a no for me, son.
Because there are times when an opinion (clearly not one based on what someone else wants to do with their genitals) can help you grow.
Because what are we doing if we’re not exposing ourselves to new ideas.
What are we doing if we aren’t learning from, not just books, but from other people and their experiences?
What are we doing when we insolate ourselves from everything that doesn’t fall in line with our current thought process?
The answer: wallowing in our comfort.
So this week I want you to keep in mind that while you’re building your community …
That you press pause on your hasty block game …
Just to make sure you’re not exiling people …
Simply because they don’t agree with you …
Because you never know what you can learn from someone else’s perspective.
Love and Light,
What did you say?
You miss me when I’m gone?
Well, you know you can keep up with my antics every other day of the week:
You can also find all of my books The Becoming of Us, Vol. I, The Becoming of Us, Vol. II, What’s Hiding in the Dark: 10 Tales of Urban Lore, and They Eat on Amazon: