I love people. I really do. I try to spread my sunshine and rainbows and all of that good stuff.
But there are some people in this world that are so allergic to positivity and productivity that it makes you want to throat punch them with your gauntlet of good vibes.
For the sake of this conversation, we shall refer to these people as … drum roll, please … Y’ALL!
You see, I can’t stand “ya’ll!”
I would say I hate “y’all”, but my momma said to never say I hate anyone, so yeah …
And you … yes, you know exactly the “ya’ll” I’m talking about because they’re everywhere!
The “ya’ll” that always have something negative to say;
The “ya’ll” that never pulls their own weight;
The “ya’ll” that wants to “win” so badly that they’ll manipulate the weak and step on the strong to get where they want to be.
Because no matter what I do, I end up running into “ya’ll”.
Trust me, I’ve tried to run away and hide from “y’all”, in hopes that if I stayed as quiet as a house when the kids are doing something they shouldn’t be, that “y’all” would go away.
But it’s like a horror movie. “Y’all” get run over, shot, stabbed, set on fire, and buried, but do you stop? No. You just show up in the forest of life, machete in hand, ready to chop down any progress anyone is making.
I know that was dramatic af, but I really can’t stand “y’all”.
So what did I learn this week, you ask?
Clearly, I’ve been very well acquainted with my distaste for “y’all” for some time now, so it isn’t that.
What I did learn is that “y’all” aren’t going anywhere and I can’t outrun your slasher film stealthiness, so I’m going to have to figure out how to deal with “y’all”.
So if you can’t stand “y’all” as much as I can’t, here’s the top 3 things I’ve done this week to protect my peace (and productivity) from “y’all”.
- For the Negative “Y’all” – When they start spewing their negativity around the room, don’t make eye contact because this “y’all” is slick and they’ll take it as if you somehow condone this nonsense. Instead, just smile and change the subject. But be vigilant, dear reader because the negative “y’all” is often times persistent. They will try to steer you back into their black hole of bullshit. Just stay strong in your force field of productivity, keep that smile warm, and be equipped with a long list of alternative subjects on hand.
- For the Lazy “Y’all” – This “y’all” is especially problematic because when working as a group, their success or failure is equal to your success or failure. That’s what makes this brand of “y’all” particularly annoying. The best we can do with them is to set clear expectations in advance, divvy out the work, perform status checks along the way, and document, document, document! Now, this may not save you from having to do some clean-up work in for your final product, but it will put the pressure on and give you a basis for proper snitching (ahem, performance evaluations) when it’s all said and done. But whatever you do DO NOT TO THE WORK FOR THEM!
- For the IDGAF about Anyone Else “Y’all” – These are tricky. They come in different forms, folks, and most times you won’t even see them coming until you’re pulling the knives out of your back. You see, dealing with these type of “y’alls” has more to do with you than them. So the best you can do is to make sure you’re on point, above board, pulling your weight, and MINDING YOUR BUSINESS. Limit conversations with this brand of “y’all” to just work or the project at hand and keep it moving. Don’t feed this “y’all” monster any ammunition they can use to throw you under the bus because their arms are strong from the years of shoving sharp objects into people their perceive as being in their way.
And that’s all I have folks.
If anyone has any other suggestions, the light on my inbox is open. Because I’m tired from fighting the “y’alls” all week.
Love and Light to y’all. I mean, not “y’all”, but y’all. I’m out.
Until next week, folks!
What did you say?
You miss me when I’m gone?
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