We spend a lot of time fighting against things that will never change.
Why? Simply because we have hard time managing our expectations.
More specifically, it’s the expectations we have of other people WHEN IT’S BEEN REPEATEDLY DEMONSTRATED THAT THEY DON’T WANT TO OR ARE INCAPABLE OF MEETING THEM.
I can’t count how many times in my life when I wanted a person to behave in a certain kind of way (yes, clearly I’m slow to catch on LOL) and no matter what I did, they could just never seem to get it right.
And that’s my fault.
Not because people aren’t responsible for themselves, but because of my expectations of another’s actions and behavior.
Because it always boils down to one of two things, it’s either:
- The fact that we’re all different; our moral compasses pointing in different directions at times; our personal goggles shading and shaping every human we meet; every experience we have. So the things we do, how we react is going to be different.
OR
- The other person just doesn’t give a shit enough to respect you and your perspective and adjust their behavior.
Without understanding this, I often ended up being the only one unhappy, upset, and disappointed … because the other person was blind to (sometimes selectively) my expectations.
So the next time you ask yourself, “I don’t know what I’m doing wrong, she just won’t do what she’s supposed to do.”
Or
“I keep telling him how I feel about it and he keeps doing the same thing.”
Or, even …
“I can’t believe they did that.”
Give yourself a little pep talk and adjust your crown.
Because you’re not doing anything wrong outside of not properly managing your expectations. And the only things you can really do is accept the behavior or TAKE SOME ACTION WITH AND WITHIN YOURSELF TO CHANGE IT.
Until next time folks,
Be kind to yourself;
Be kind to others;
But take no shit;
And leave the expectations for pregnant chicks.
Love and Light,
Erin
What did you say?
You miss me when I’m gone?
Well, you know you can keep up with my antics every other day of the week …
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You can also find all of my books The Becoming of Us, Vol. I, The Becoming of Us, Vol. II, What’s Hiding in the Dark: 10 Tales of Urban Lore, and They Eat on Amazon: